End the insanity: Abolish the TSA

I recently flew on a short business trip.  I arrived, as recommended, two hours early for my one-hour-and-fifteen-minute flight.  As I approached the huge line for the security check, I estimated - correctly - that I'd be in line for the next hour.  Great - another hour of my valuable time trashed.  I could feel my blood pressure rise and my anxiety increase.  What would it be this time?  Would there be some sort of delay up ahead that would cause me to miss my flight?  Would I forget something on my person on in my bag that would alert the security team, like a belt buckle, or reading glasses, or wetting solution for my contact lenses?

I remember the time they pulled me aside for a personal inspection.  Why?  Because my pants were too baggy, and baggy pants are suspicious.  Why were my pants baggy?  Because I had to remove my belt, and when raised my hands up for the body scanner, my too-loose pants drooped.

I basically enjoy flying, but the National Security Agency (NSA) crap just sucks all the joy out of it.  Many times, I've come within a minute of missing a flight due to security delays, and even that was after giving myself oodles of spare time just in case.  Once I was in the San Francisco airport, trying to fly back to Houston, and security took over two hours that day.  

Once on a business trip, the security team spent an awful lot of time viewing my carry-on bag.  Then they opened it up, dug thru the contents, and pulled out my wire stripper.  I work on electrical systems and sometimes I need to make on-the-spot repairs, thus the tool.  (I had no checked bags.)  So they confiscated my wire stripper.  Well, I suppose one could take down a 737 in-flight with a wire stripper, right?

Probably my most bizarre security hassle was with that water bottle.  On the previous connecting flight, they gave me a bottle of water.  I stuck in in my bag to drink later.  It bore the airline's logo, and was un-opened.  The security team pulled me aside and told me I had an unallowed item.  What?!?  The friggin airline gave it to me, IN-FLIGHT!  And now you're telling me I cannot bring it on board?  Who the hell comes up with these rules?!?

Yet ball-point pens and freshly-sharpened pencils are Ok.  You know, if you wanted, you can do an awful lot of damage with one of those weapons.

Probably my worst security nightmare was when we were in the Virgin Islands, awaiting a flight back to Miami.  We were led out onto the blazing hot, black asphalt tarmac, in the middle of the day - in the tropics, mind you - to await our plane.  And then the security team, for some ungodly reason, decides they we all needed another security check.  Several passengers nearly fainted from the heat.  I was only steamed - very steamed.

And these are just some of my horror stories.  Google "NSA security horror stories" and read some personal accounts that will really make your blood boil, such as elderly people in wheelchairs, pregnant women, and young children getting groped.  Or the security people sharing pics of some good-looking girl in the body scanner.  And as of late, the NSA has failed some tests big-time where agents successfully got thru security with dummy "weapons".  

Supporters say the whole system makes them "feel safe", and besides, there has not been a successful airline terrorist attack in the US since the 9-11 attacks.  That is totally ridiculous, absurd, and idiotic.  First of all, the fact that nothing has happened (at least successfully) proves nothing.  For example, I can say that snapping my fingers will prevent a meteor from crashing on me.  I am snapping my fingers now … waiting … waiting … waiting … hey, no meteor!  Conclusive proof!  The fallacy, of course, is that the fact that something did NOT happen is not proof of anything.

At least a handful of terrorists have ATTEMPTED to take down planes in the years since 9-11.  One guy tried to hide explosives in his shoes, another in his underwear, and another by mixing liquids. (I still cannot figure out that liquid thing.)  In all cases, the would-be terrorists were thwarted - not by the NSA - but by alert passengers, flight crew, and the terrorist's own ineptitude.  But no matter; in each case, the NSA, in its usual fashion, over-reacted and declared that henceforth, passengers' shoes, liquids, and underwear shall be inspected.

The NSA's budget for FY 2018 is $8 billion, courtesy of us taxpayers.  And there's no way to estimate how much NSA inspections cost us all in time, hassle, stress, missed flights, and people choosing to simply not fly.

It's time to end the insanity and abolish the NSA completely.  Airport security inspections are just theatre; they have nothing whatsoever to do with actually preventing terrorism.  It's all an act meant to show us that the government truly cares about us.  Instead, let the airlines handle their own security, for they are in the best position to judge customer satisfaction versus necessary protection.  And passengers can then "vote with their dollars" for whoever does the best job of it.